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Juliet Robertson's avatar

Nothing. I would simply enjoy the free time as that, for doing what I felt like in that particular moment. After all the moment we "do" something it stops becoming free time because we've scheduled it and/or committed to it in some way. Culturally this goes against the way we are taught to think and be in most of our current societies which value drive, motivation, purpose, achievement, influence, etc. Is it not enough just to "be" some of the time? Or must we call this "me-time" or "meditation" or "down time" or "holiday" or "spending more time with my family" to give ourselves permission just to be?

I spent most of my life rushing about. When I stopped being a school principal after 8.5 years in 2007, I promised myself I would only do work that was play for me and that I would do all the things I didn't have time to do as a principal. Whilst I did work hard, it never felt like work. I loved 95% of it - I became an education consultant specialising in learning and play outdoors and did substitute teaching.

Now I only have months to live, as I have a blood cancer (Acute Myeloid Leukaemia) which can no longer be treated. Aside from medical matters which take up too much of my precious time, it's "free" time and I continue to love every moment. I'm still busy but have freedom to choose. Whilst death is close - I'm in my mid fifties, I know I have a privileged life and grateful to have had the experiences, good fortune, deep friendships and capacity that have enabled me to have such a free life (alongside living in a wealthy country). I was the family breadwinner until very recently and deliberately paid myself a modest income which was usually slightly less than the UK average most years I was a consultant.

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Julia Parker's avatar

I have 3 young kids and, although my husband tries his best, I'm not yet able to leave the kids alone. If suddenly that changed, I would go back to salsa dancing. It was something my Mum frowned upon when I first started as an 18 year old, compared to the other activities I did as a child (which she overly praised and tried to encourage - none of which I want to do anymore either). It was the one place I felt was 100% my choice, and the other salseras always made me feel welcome.

As a side note, my brain never stops thinking. Salsa is the only thing I've found which forces my brain to switch off, as I have to concentrate enough to follow the man's lead but, by following the lead, I am not in control of anything at all, so my brain is unable to think of other worries. It's also a social time and having moved around a lot, has been an easier way to get to know people than just randomly going upto people and trying to make small talk.

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